Over four years ago, on a visit to India, elders in her house expressed a keen desire to carry out a traditional ceremony for her son, their grandson. It was a daunting task, given the circumstances, esp. the autism situation involved and the duration of these kind of ceremonies.
At the time of course, it was understood that the ceremony would be held in India. That was even more daunting, esp. at that time, because social awareness was really low when it comes to certain conditions. She just managed to put it aside at the time. It always remained at the back of her mind though. Every now and then since then, the topic would come up, and it would be discussed and she would side track it. Then came a time when it could no longer be avoided, and they decided that it was time to face it and find a solution rather than just sweep it under the rug one more time.
She thought about it and decided it would be better if the ceremony was held at a venue which was familiar to her son. She decided that she would try and put him through the least bit of discomfort. She looked for options and realized that things were slowly falling into place like pieces of a puzzle. What needed to be done was coordinate everything to make it go like a well oiled machine. That required meticulous planning, but that is the part she always enjoyed. The main task was to explain to the elders that it was necessary to hold the ceremony in the town the boy lived, so he was familiar with the surroundings and the people who would attend. Once that was taken care of, the rest was alright. The family in India were totally supportive of this decision, it was after all, the boy's ceremony and his comfort was top priority.
She started teaching him some chants that are recited during the ceremony, and in spite of the language issue because of autism, the boy managed to learn the chants well. She started planning on the venue, the menu and the rest of the details. Close friends were excited. It is not always that a ceremony of this type was held in this town, away from family. They promised to be there and help in any way possible. Invitation cards were printed, she had bought the paper specially from India. She had bought clothes for everyone, and also gifts for all the friends. As the day neared, excitement built up.
The priest had been briefed about the boy's autism and his unpredictable ability to sit through a ceremony. He assured her he would take care of it.
She looked at her son fondly. His clothes were tailor made for him and sent by a special courier from India. Her husband was also going to be dressed traditionally. Her sister arrived with her family from out of town. She prayed that the event would go well.
On the big day, everyone woke up early, showered and got dressed. The boy wanted his ipod. She tried to reason with him. That was when the tantrum began. She was in tears, and thought of the saying 'the morning shows the day'. She tried reasoning with her son, but he just kept getting louder and more annoyed.
That was when she just stood at the altar and prayed........ she had now placed everything is His hands and asked that He take care of everything from that moment on. They left for the temple.
From that point onwards, everything was like a surreal dream. The boy was at his patient best. He sat through the ceremony that took about three and a half hours. He did everything he was told, he chanted everything he was supposed to chant. The priest accommodated all of the boy's needs and handled the whole ceremony very well. The guests arrived in all their finery and joined in the festivity. The whole event just floated by in time. And just like that, it was all done.
The scene then moved to the venue of the reception. Everybody got there and wished the boy and had a hearty vegetarian lunch. The traditional food was very good and people enjoyed the fare. Pictures were taken and everyone had a great time. Friends and family did not make one feel that this event was done on foreign soil. It was a wonderful experience.
Most of all, the prayer which she had said early that morning, leaving everything in His hands, was answered. He took care of his flock, as he always does. That was the most beautiful experience.
At the time of course, it was understood that the ceremony would be held in India. That was even more daunting, esp. at that time, because social awareness was really low when it comes to certain conditions. She just managed to put it aside at the time. It always remained at the back of her mind though. Every now and then since then, the topic would come up, and it would be discussed and she would side track it. Then came a time when it could no longer be avoided, and they decided that it was time to face it and find a solution rather than just sweep it under the rug one more time.
She thought about it and decided it would be better if the ceremony was held at a venue which was familiar to her son. She decided that she would try and put him through the least bit of discomfort. She looked for options and realized that things were slowly falling into place like pieces of a puzzle. What needed to be done was coordinate everything to make it go like a well oiled machine. That required meticulous planning, but that is the part she always enjoyed. The main task was to explain to the elders that it was necessary to hold the ceremony in the town the boy lived, so he was familiar with the surroundings and the people who would attend. Once that was taken care of, the rest was alright. The family in India were totally supportive of this decision, it was after all, the boy's ceremony and his comfort was top priority.
She started teaching him some chants that are recited during the ceremony, and in spite of the language issue because of autism, the boy managed to learn the chants well. She started planning on the venue, the menu and the rest of the details. Close friends were excited. It is not always that a ceremony of this type was held in this town, away from family. They promised to be there and help in any way possible. Invitation cards were printed, she had bought the paper specially from India. She had bought clothes for everyone, and also gifts for all the friends. As the day neared, excitement built up.
The priest had been briefed about the boy's autism and his unpredictable ability to sit through a ceremony. He assured her he would take care of it.
She looked at her son fondly. His clothes were tailor made for him and sent by a special courier from India. Her husband was also going to be dressed traditionally. Her sister arrived with her family from out of town. She prayed that the event would go well.
On the big day, everyone woke up early, showered and got dressed. The boy wanted his ipod. She tried to reason with him. That was when the tantrum began. She was in tears, and thought of the saying 'the morning shows the day'. She tried reasoning with her son, but he just kept getting louder and more annoyed.
That was when she just stood at the altar and prayed........ she had now placed everything is His hands and asked that He take care of everything from that moment on. They left for the temple.
From that point onwards, everything was like a surreal dream. The boy was at his patient best. He sat through the ceremony that took about three and a half hours. He did everything he was told, he chanted everything he was supposed to chant. The priest accommodated all of the boy's needs and handled the whole ceremony very well. The guests arrived in all their finery and joined in the festivity. The whole event just floated by in time. And just like that, it was all done.
The scene then moved to the venue of the reception. Everybody got there and wished the boy and had a hearty vegetarian lunch. The traditional food was very good and people enjoyed the fare. Pictures were taken and everyone had a great time. Friends and family did not make one feel that this event was done on foreign soil. It was a wonderful experience.
Most of all, the prayer which she had said early that morning, leaving everything in His hands, was answered. He took care of his flock, as he always does. That was the most beautiful experience.
